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Sam M. (Hertfordshire U.K.) - Rebuilding a life after Separation


Our lives were turned upside down after my husband decided to leave without a word leaving me with two beautiful young children.. I was a new mother maintaining a very successful career and in a loving relationship, or so I thought. When my husband left, my whole world collapsed and came crashing down at my feet leaving me feeling devastated, sad and alone, no energy to carry on. I battled as best I could, for as long as I could but after a while every day just seemed to bring more burdens and eventually I felt as though I was being crushed. If it hadnt been for my children, I wouldnt have been able to come out of my house, no matter how hard I tried, I couldnt understand why this had happened and I felt totally worthless and eventually I became weaker and even my life felt like a real burden. 


I had grown up in the same town as Satish and we occasionally bumped into one another at one function or another.  At our last meeting, Satish not knowing the change in my personal circumstances placed a firm hand on my shoulder and invited me to tea.
When I arrived I was greeted with open arms and  my eyes filled with tears as we sat over tea. I didnt know it until much later but Satish had started to work with me as soon as I arrived and by the time I left I was actually looking forward to something, at last! At my next meeting I dove into the process,  and with the gentle but persistent help of Satish, I managed to somehow find a safe place in myself and learned how to touch this place whenever I needed. From here I re-examined my deep beliefs about loving myself and others, recognising how harshly I judged myself and I was stunned to find just how many beliefs I had held about not being a worthy or good enough person.

I discovered that this stemmed from when I grew up with my mother, who had wished I had never been born, and this had left me  leaving me feeling hurt and angry. My mother always loved my brothers more than I. Since the death of my father and the loss of my husband, the relationship between my mother and I reached its nadir. I faced a double edged challenge to heal my relationship with my mother and overcome my own cycle of feeling victimised. Satish proved to be a never ending source of courage as I worked through the processes and today I have more loving and satisfying relationships with my children, my brothers and sisters and especially my mother, and I feeling my old passion in everything that we do together as a family.

In spring,  I joined a leisure club taking up tennis for the first time, "a complete natural" the Coach praised me.  Over the past 6 months I have organised regular tennis games and matches for newcomers to tennis. In recognition the Club presented me with an award for being the Best Newcomer to the club in 2008.  Since then, I have achieved my Level One tennis Coaching Certification allowing me to coach young children thus leading to a part-time job in 2009.


Satish continues to be very much a part of my family and I am truly honoured to be a part of his family too.

Sam M, Hertfordshire (UK)

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